Read me...Read me...Read me and be hypnotized by me. Let your intellectual nipple be open and free so I may tickle it. You may ask yourself in reading this, "Where exactly is my intellectual nipple?" Then you may say to yourself, "Well, if I don't know where my intellectual nipple is then I guess I'm not very intellectual," and you would be right, you aren't. But the intellectual nipple is quite elusive and ironic, and it is just that last thought that may help you to discover your intellectual nipple. Cary Smith will take you on a ride down his life and mind (and it won't be as creepy as it sounds). Along the way you may giggle, you may hate, you may love, and most likely in the amount of time it will take you to read this book, you will fart...this book does not consider itself prestigious or boring enough to deny that fact. Cary Smith will guide you along the way to possibly having your intellectual nipple tickled. Brad Cruise will uninvitingly add stuff to the text and make corrections as a special guest corrector. And most importantly, your intellectual nipple will be tickled, maybe? And according to Brad Cruise, the key to finding out where your intellectual nipple is is to realize that Cary Smith is poop and a writer not worthy of the very worthy literary world which sometimes makes people very sleepy. Once you have this realization your intellectual nipple will bask in tickling pleasure. (That is, if you consider tickling to be pleasurable, because many people don't, and, in fact, many find it torturous.) Just a warning from this summary: if you do find out where your intellectual nipple is (as everyone's intellectual nipple is not in the same place), it is recommended that you not tickle it too much unless you've had a few cocktails. If you just read this summary and said, "What in the hell?" then you are on your way to a discovery of the elusive intellectual nipple. This summary has exhausted itself and is tired of saying, "The elusive intellectual nipple." Please enjoy The Book, hate it very, very much, or go somewhere in the middle with your opinion of it.
About the Author: Cary Smith is a pain in the ass vagabond. No one knows where he is, and he always has his agent tell us he's dead. I may be an annoyed publisher, but when you deal with Cary Smith, you deal with an asshole. And the only time I use this vulgar language is when I think of Cary Smith. Cary Smith's residence is unknown, and who knows if any thing he says about his past is true. He sent us a note after we finally accepted his book, reluctantly I might add, and if he did not email us every day, and sit outside of our office every day, we never would have accepted his book, because, really, we were just trying to get a gnat out of our face. Anyways, since there's nothing else to put about the author except this probably fake picture, with his probably fake dog, here's how the note read: For the about the author sleeve. One, Cary Smith, noble man and owner of a Golden Retriever, is currently working on an index to supplement Four Corners or A Book That Will Tickle Your Intellectual Nipple. Cary Smith is currently working on the index with the Golden Retriever of Professing, one Sir Brad Cruise. The index is entitled: The Some's, Them's and They's of Four Corners or A Book That Will Tickle Your Intellectual Nipple. Also, Cary Smith would like to say he is not part of any New Age Movement, or cult. When someone first said to Cary Smith that he was New Age, Cary Smith had no idea what that person was talking about, in fact, Cary Smith thought that that person just meant he was part of the new generation, that he was young and part of the new era. Only later did he find out that New Age was a whole religion and philosophy, and apparently as Cary Smith denies his New Ageism, this makes him New Age. Cary Smith would like to be a part of no New Age cult, and is currently a part of no New Age religion or philosophy, because he's way too damn old school.